My Kids

I have 20 kids. Okay, they're not actually mine but Shortie and I refer to them as "our kids". Shortie and I have been friends since the 5th grade. We've done everything together. We founded a club called AAA together. We didn't know there was already an AAA and had we known it probably wouldn't have mattered. Our AAA was the "All Against Alison" club. Along with couple other select 5th graders, we would meet once a week to share in our hatred for our classmate (who really shouldn't have been our classmate 'cause she failed like 10 times), Alison. I know. We were mean girls. But she had it coming. I don't know what she did but it must have been awful to necessitate weekly meeting minutes dutifully recorded in the AAA notebook. TOP SECRET. 15 years later we're neighbors in Buffalo and we work together. We're still working on one day living next door to one another and having water slides from each of our bedroom windows that lead to a super cool pool. Anyhow, I digress.
Our kids are hilarious. They are 6-9th grade Buffalo Public School students enrolled in a NYSED funded after-school and summer program. These kids are something else. I don't know how many " yous guys" and " I seen yous" I've corrected. At least several hundred. But they will call you out instantly if you slip up. I had a royal slip up in April. The last week of April is national tv turn-off week and I wanted all the kids to participate. I got up in front of the class and explained the rules: no tv, no computer, no movies, no video games, no play boy..........Did I just say what I think I said? Maybe they won't notice. Cue uncontrollable laughter. Shit. I meant game boy. No playing game boy. It's 4 months later and whenever someone brings it up the rest of them are soon rolling on the floor. They still say "yous". Sigh. I do love them though. Today was probably one of funniest days yet. The girls in the program are working on a Travel-Savvy themed curriculum this summer. Over the past two days they've been creating their own country. I gave them complete creative control. They could be princesses, presidents, czarinas, whatever. They could decide who lived in their country, what the weather was like, what the customs were, what buildings there were, etc. I decided to create my own country along with them. Today we did a little show and tell. All of the kids went, then Shortie, then me. I held up my colored pencil drawing and began describing my country "Island T". There is a lovely mansion protected by a grand iron gate with a disproportionatley large porch just meant for sitting under shade and drinking lemonade. There's a spa just steps away from the house. In the middle of the "T" is a great city where it's perpetually night-time so you can always see the city lights. Only 2 people live on this island, me and Johnny Depp. Hey, it's my country. At that point one of girls stopped me and asked very sincerely: "On your anniversary will Johnny Depp dress up like Captain Sparrow for you?" I had nothing. What could I say? It was my turn to laugh. I love them.